If you haven’t heard the news about the new CGI adaptation of the musical Cats, you’ve clearly been hiding in a cupboard or in a box for the last several days. A bit like a cat, in fact.
But for those of you who have been in hiding, let us be the first to break it to you. The movie is – according to about 90% of cinema-goers – terrible. Not just terrible, terrifying , with the CGI cat/human hybrid characters freaking people out from Edinburgh to Ecuador.
In fact, ever since the trailer dropped in July, people have been losing their minds about the new Cats movie – and not in a good way.
Nothing about it seems to make any sense. From what we can make out, it’s about a tribe of Cats called the Jellicles, who spend a night making the life-changing “Jellicle choice” of deciding which cat will make its way to the Heaviside Layer – also known as Heaven.
The film uses the cast’s real, human faces; the rest is all CGI.
One person said: “I watched Cats in a sustained, two hour, full-body recoil. It is HIDEOUS. It is TERRIBLE. It is NIGHTMARE and CHAOS come to horrible life. THEY NEVER STOP SINGING #CatsMovie,” said one viewer.
Another added: #CatsMovie… the hairball of nightmare fibres, forever lodged in the throat of my mind.”
Others just couldn’t find the words to describe it. One said: “I’ve been trying to write a tweet for #CatsMovie for almost 20 minutes and I just can’t come up with anything. I’m truly speechless. I’m baffled by the fact that this movie exists. I don’t even know what an actual cat looks like anymore. It’s a truly horrifying experience. Yikes.”
Someone else just said: “Oh god, my eyes.”
formerly Mad Cornish Projectionist.